In which Noah is so criminally untalented, we might as well not even call him back.

5 October 2010 In which Noah is so criminally untalented, we might as well not even call him back.

Largely self-explanatory, but goshdarnit I’m going to rant anyway.

May 2010: Homewood Drama Guy [who shall remain unnamed] informs me that HHS will be doing Little Shop of Horrors in the fall with me in the Seymour role. I’d be lying if I said this didn’t influence my decision to return to Homewood.

August 2010: I am told that HHS will be doing no such thing, but rather a murder mystery improv play that no one’s heard of.

September 2010: I wake up on the day of auditions and start vomiting. Thus, I stay home from school and am informed by a classmate that Homewood Drama Guy will let me audition the next day.

Plot twist: I return to school the next day to find the show cast, and Homewood Drama Guy decidedly unwilling to answer any of my questions. Two of which were “Is there a reason you didn’t want me to audition?” and “Who the hell do you think you are?” Homewood Drama Guy later tells me that I’m the strongest male performer he has. So yeah, all his behavior makes total sense.

October 2010: As I do absolutely nothing in Theatre class [since I'm not in the play] I find out that I haven’t received a callback for a show I auditioned for in August. In all fairness, I didn’t receive a callback for the same program last year and was still cast, but this pretty much means that I’m not even being considered for anything more than a menial ensemble role at best.

Conclusion: I love everyone. I do. I’m happy to be alive and all that crap, but seriously. It’s times like these that I thank the lord that I haven’t put all of my stock in theatre.

PS: The spring musical Homewood’s doing this year? It’s a jukebox show written for a touring company in Australia called Back to the 80s. Yes, that’s right. We’re not even doing a real musical. Roll tide.

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